You Know You’re A Twin Mama When…
…you’re able to multitask so well you think it should be recognised with some sort of degree certificate. I am able to feed my baby twins and express at the same time, do two loads of laundry, complete the online food shop, entertain both babies using a household appliance (the washing machine is our new favorite toy), take the babies for a walk in the park, answer the door to the postman (why do they always turn up when it’s expressing time?), do the bath and bed time single-handedly, pay the electricity bill, wrap and send a friend’s birthday present, publish a blog post, update my Instagram AND cook the dinner, ready for when Pete arrives home. Boom.
…coffee is now considered a vital food group of your diet. Sometimes I am so exhausted I consider just eating it out of the jar.
…you think you’re having constant deja vu. Feed feed, change change, sleep sleep is all you know, especially in the first few weeks. Just make sure it’s the correct baby you feed and change…nobody wants a screaming, ravenous baby who is covered in poo because you fed the first baby twice and forgot to change the second baby’s nappy.
…you stock up on nappies as if it’s Black Friday.
…you quickly learn how to function on little or no sleep. Before I had our babies a friend said to me: ‘You don’t know what being tired actually feels like until you have newborns’ and gosh were they right. The endurance of trying to keep two babies alive when you are unable to put your head on a pillow for more than 20 minutes at a time is unbelievably tough. As soon as one baby would settle to sleep the other one decides it is play time. I don’t think so little one. Which brings me onto my next point:
…you quickly learn how to get your babies onto some sort of schedule to gain back a little bit of human existence. The best piece of twin advice I followed was to feed them at the same time. This meant they became in sync with each other and would consequently nap at the same time too. So finally I could stop acting like a human conveyor belt.
…your social life that included drinking copious amounts of Prosecco like an irresponsible teenager at the weekends has diminished and now all you pray for is 3 hours of uninterrupted sleep, eating a warm meal and having a shower that lasts for more than two and a half minutes.
…you are treated like a z-list celebrity. As I walk around Primark trying to find clothes that will almost compliment (disguise) my new found mama curves, I am regularly approached by many passers by wanting to chat about twin life. Yes they’re twins. No they’re not identical. Yes we are extremely lucky. No, not double trouble, double delights.
…you feel like you have permanent double vision. Two bouncers, two car seats, two cribs…the list is endless.
…your choice of shopping places are now limited to super-sized department stores. No one has experienced anxiety like a new parent trying to navigate a double pram that is wider than a 4×4 around the aisles of a tiny shop. The struggle is real.
…your problem solving skills are tested daily. I can identify what is causing one baby to cry whilst entertaining the other, figure out how to pack a baby’s changing bag whilst covered in baby milk, locate the best nappy changing areas in an unknown town and pack a double iCandy pram into a fiat 500.
…you have the skills of an organised Mary Poppins. If you follow me on our Foxfairy Twins Instagram page you’ll know I can pack 6 nappies, a pack of wet wipes, two flasks of hot water, formula, take away milk, nappy rash cream, 2 sleep suits, 2 vests, 2 pairs of spare socks, hand sanitiser, nappy bags, my purse, a hairbrush, muslin cloths, bibs, sterilised bottles, teething toys, a sandwich for myself and a water bottle all into one rucksack and carry it around for the day.
…you learn to manipulate your body into the most obscure angles to manage looking after both babies on your own. My most hilarious experience of this was when I had to balance Francis’ bottle with my chin whilst using my foot to rock Beatrice in her bouncer as she was crying uncontrollably due to teething. I needed to use my hands to get the baby paracetamol ready to give to her but couldn’t stop feeding Francis as if I broke his feed he would simply not drink anymore, then would be hungry soon after. Skills.
…you can maintain a budget. Having twins, I can identify which items can be bought second hand, which items they can share, items that we will need in the future and purchase in the sales and live on a minimal food shop to make sure we do not over spend.
…you quickly learn which baby is crying through the baby monitor. Francis has a wailing sound to his cry, whereas Beatrice is just a screech. I can now also work out what each cry is for: ‘Mama I’m hungry’, ‘Mama I’m tired’, ‘Mama I need cuddles’.
…you recognize that each baby is unique with their own personalities. Francis is extremely chilled and will happily sit and take in all that is going on around him, whereas Beatrice is a feisty firecracker, always wanting to know what everyone is up to. I feel I have the ultimate privilege of helping our beautiful babies to learn and grow into two individual people. Not that I want to wish the time away, but I cannot wait to see what they are going to be like when they’re older. Whatever path they choose, I am just so grateful and proud that they are our babies.
There you are, a little insight into what life with baby twins is like. Is it what you expected? Did anything surprise you?
Love, The Foxfairies x
Featured on Motherhood: Braking the Looking Glass